Highland family shares message 'it's OK to talk' at memorial football tournament to raise awareness of issues surrounding suicide
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Memories of a young woman who took her own life have been rekindled at a football tournament in Inverness to raise awareness of the issues surrounding suicide.
Carolyn Firth had just turned 21 when she died.
Devastated family members are still trying to heal and although they will never be whole again are determined to help prevent others experiencing the same pain they have endured.
Her parents Iain and Lorraine, their son Nick (33) and daughters Shannon (23) and Leanne (13) started an annual women’s football tournament in the Highlands for teams to compete for the Carolyn Firth Memorial Cup and to raise money to support mental health services.
For the first time, it has taken place in Inverness with a scaled-down tournament being held after the event could not go ahead as usual in July due to the coronavirus pandemic.
Four teams – two representing Inverness Caledonian Thistle Women’s Development FC and two men’s veteran teams – took to the all-weather pitch at Inverness Royal Academy.
One of the men’s teams emerged the winner while the event raised £450 for the Scottish Association for Mental Health (SAMH).
Shannon Firth, who lives with her parents in Inshes, said the event took on even more importance this year, given the impact of the pandemic on people’s mental health.
"This year has been hard for us all and we would like to take the time to stand together and remember all the hard work that has gone into getting everyone through this year," Miss Firth said.
"We feel it is so important to take the time to reflect on this year. It’s not about what we have lost but what we have learned to cherish."
Miss Firth, who is now a volunteer with SAMH, recalled how her whole life turned upside down in 2011.
"I was 13 and there was a knock at the door and two police officers gave my family and I the worst news imaginable," she said.
"My older sister Carolyn had committed suicide – she was only 21.
"She got herself into some difficult situation and she was too scared to open up.
"Instead of talking and asking for help, she decided to end it all and took her own life. I have never experienced a pain like it. Losing my best friend, my big sister."
Miss Firth, a service desk analyst for Cap Gemini, said since her sister’s death all the family had experienced issues with mental health.
"We have struggled with bouts of depression and anxiety – but together we keep each other going," she said.
"I didn’t know how to process the pain I was feeling and I was too scared to speak with my family in case I upset them. I think that is the hardest part – we were all in pain and too scared to talk in case we made it worse, but how could it possibly be any worse?"
She said suicide was a massive issue across Scotland with reports every day of a life gone too soon.
She said the football tournament gave teams the chance to play football, have some fun and raise awareness and funds.
"We also include a men’s over 40s team as they are one of the most highly affected groups," she said.
"We raise money, we reminisce about Carolyn and we try to spread the message that it’s OK to talk.
"Since doing this, my family’s mental health has improved as we are focused on not what we’ve lost but preventing people from experiencing the same pain we have."
She urged people to keep a check on others and to give them a call to see if they were OK.
"It is so important to talk,” she said.
"If Carolyn had reached out, she would not have ended up in the situation she did.
"It is always preventable."
